A Trip Down Memory Lane

Today I tackled the basement boxes.  It has been on my list of things to do for a while, but I've been avoiding it.  They were mostly boxes that get moved from place to place, but never unpacked.  They hold memories and snapshots of various times in my life.  And while their contents have no value, they are priceless in defining the journey I've made to become me.  These are boxes that for months now I've been telling myself I need to sort because I just don't want to have to move them again next summer should we find ourselves matching to an out of state residency program.

Generally, I do a good job of not hoarding too much stuff.  However, I am a sentimental gal and over the years I've kept my fair share of memorabilia.  For example, today I finally recycled four years worth of college papers that I'd written and saved.  I also ceremoniously rid myself of that dreadful final letter from my drawing professor freshman year who told me "your attitude, attendance and work ethic are second to none but your skill is lacking and that certainly has factored into your grade."  I came across a few sentimental letters I'd received from great friends over the years and some odd trinkets I'd never quite known what to do with but felt attached to and couldn't get myself to toss.

It was one of those mixed up days where I wasn't quite sure how to feel.  On one hand, I only look at this stuff every few years at most.  On the other hand, many items in those boxes represent me and who I am today.  Some items encouraged me at important times in my life.  Other items were the byproduct of the hard work and knowledge I'd gained throughout my courses in school.  Some, like the letter from my all too honest art professor, represent the challenges I've had.  It was simultaneously cathartic and painful to sort through those boxes today, and tonight I am admittedly a little wiped out.  However, I am thankful to have another thing crossed off my to do list.

In honor of the sorting I thought I'd share with you a piece I wrote in my ninth grade health class (yes, the contents of the boxes went back more than ten years).  The assignment we had was to create something that represented us.  As my college art professor solidified for me many years later, art wasn't my thing and I chose to write something instead.  I modeled my piece after a poem I had identified with that had been written by another missionary kid.  It was interesting to read through this again and think about who I was then, who I am now and who I am still becoming.  Without further ado here it is...

What most don't know...
What most don't know as they go walking by is that on the outside I look like everyone else, but inside there is so much more.  I have my own ideas and feelings.  I have highs and lows.  I have likes and dislikes.  I have good days and bad days.  I have my own fears and dreams.  I have my own goals to make and my own obstacles to overcome.  I have a past behind me and a future ahead of me.

What most don't know is that I'm 15 years old, and I hate to drive.  I went to a French school in kindergarten.  I love gymnastics.  I used to help my friends take care of their ring tailed lemurs.  I hate snow, cold weather and seeing my breath.  I love the sun, warm weather and Christmas on the beach.

What most don't know is that my favorite baby-sitter and I used to play the game SORRY in two different languages without understanding each other in either language.  Most of my friends come from different places around the world.  I am fluent in Norwegian.  I had to teach myself to read in English.  I am the oldest sister of two younger brothers.

What most don't know is that my favorite game when I was little was school, but I am the one who dreads going back to school the most.  I don't want to give up being a little kid, but I can't wait to grow up.  I am never wrong.  I could crawl out of my crib, stroller and car seat by the age of one.  I love to tease and hate being teased.

What most don't know is that I love tomatoes.  I can not sleep on airplanes or in the car.  The first language I learned to read and write in was French.  I was the little kid who thought they served rice at McDonald's.  I grew up in a country that had one brand of cereal.  I went to a Norwegian School in fourth and fifth grade.

What most don't know is that when I was two I had to travel halfway around the world to see my grandparents for the very first time.  I always want to be somewhere I'm not.  The friends who understand me best I use a paper and pen or e-mail to talk to.  I have no idea what to be when I grow up.  I am a diver on the High School Swim Team.  I love to sing.  My favorite songs are still from Sunday school.

What most don't know as they go walking by is that I might look like everyone else, but I am not.  No, I am myself.  I can't be anyone else, and no one can be me.    

Today's Numbers

I see a lot of numbers when working in the ICU.  My patients depend on me to interpret those numbers and respond to them appropriately.  Therefore, it is probably fitting that today after going to another prenatal check-up, I am thankful for three numbers.  These numbers are 27, 139 and 155.

The first number is 27.  This is how far along I am.  It's crazy to think that the third trimester has arrived and there are only 13 weeks left.  With Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up, I think the rest of this pregnancy may end up flying by pretty fast!  I also measured out perfectly, which is always a relief to know that baby is right on target for growth.

My second number is 139.  This was the my blood sugar after my glucose challenge test; which is a test for gestational diabetes.  It is that test that pregnant women complain about because they have to drink a sugary cocktail.  I had gotten some good advice before the test to choose the lemon-lime flavor.  It tasted like sweetened flat sprite.  I had low expectations going in, so I was pleasantly surprised when it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  My numbers had to be under 140, so I barely made it.  However, I passed and that's all that matters.  If I had been above 140, then I would have had to have a three hour test to actually confirm the results.  I am glad I don't have to do that.  I am also glad I don't have to test my blood sugars everyday.  In high school I almost fainted the day my anatomy class tested our blood types during a lab, so I wasn't so sure I had it in me to do that everyday.  Plus, the spot on my finger that they took a sample from still hurts tonight.  I have a lot more empathy for all the patients we have to stick on a regular basis.

Finally, I am thankful for the number 155.  This was baby's heart rate today.  Now that baby is growing, the movements it makes are even more noticeable which is always comforting to feel.  However, it is a relief whenever I get the opportunity to hear that heartbeat and have added confirmation that all is well.

While my body feels very much like it has been taken over by this baby, I really have had very few complaints throughout this pregnancy.  Fatigue, indigestion and restless legs have been my only major complaints.  Being a slightly anxious person it has at times made me feel as though things are going too well, so tonight I am going to go to bed thankful for a day of many positive confirmations on this baby's health.  I am also going to bed in eager anticipation of the last trimester, knowing now that the end is in sight.  We will soon get to meet our little one, and I can hardly wait!  Uff, I guess it better be a good night's sleep because I've been told those days are numbered!

Puppy Love

At a year and a half our dog, Sadie, isn't so much a puppy anymore.  However, she still looks like she could be and some days we wonder if she didn't just get stuck in puppy-hood somewhere along the way.  For those of you who haven't met her, she is a rescue dog.  We got her through an organization that takes in dogs from high kill shelters in the South, fosters them and then finds homes for them here in the Twin Cities.  She and her litter were found without parents, so we really aren't sure what is in her mix.  She has the colorings of a German Shepherd, but since she's stunted at 40 pounds there was some small dog mixed in there somewhere.

I would venture to say, while she has her meek moments, she is what they call a high-confidence dog.  She is spunky and energetic.  She hates cleaning and house projects.  There is nothing worse than when the vacuum cleaner and broom make their appearance from the basement.  Sadie is intelligent and loves a good training challenge.  Hard work is her middle name.  Walks and runs are much more fulfilling if there are a few sticks along the way that can be cleared out and moved along.  Her best days are spent with plenty of time outside stalking squirrels, and chasing the deer from the yard.  Her personal mission in life is to destroy all those annoying squeakers that are placed in those goofy dog toys and to rid them of their stuffing.  Most of all, she absolutely adores Nick and I.

There probably isn't much more in this world that can raise your confidence quite like the loyalty of a dog.  I am always reminded of how long it takes to walk to the end of the driveway to get the mail and return to the house when Sadie greets me at the door as cheerfully as if I'd been gone for the day.  When I take her outside to play, and she waits with joyful anticipation for her toy to be launched in the air, the look she gives me makes me feel like I am performing the most important work of the day.  Her satisfied sigh as she collapses on the floor after a good walk/run remind me of how satisfying a good workout can be.  She watches me whenever I get dressed, and if I don't end up putting on scrubs for work, her tail wags so fast it looks like she is going to take off the ground.  Finally, when she is called into the house from outside the determined look she has as she runs towards me just makes me smile.

Her cuddliest times of the day are in the morning right after she's woken up and after a good long run.  During these times she wants to sit on the floor next to me.  When I grab the blanket and sit down, she sidles up next to me and slides down to the floor, so there is absolutely no space between us.  She lets out her best happy grunt and settles into a nice nap.

We were warned when we bought our house to not rush into the dog ownership trap, but we couldn't resist.  I think we made it about a two weeks after we moved in before we started looking, and about two weeks more before Sadie was officially in our house to stay.  Sure, we each have days where the responsibility of a dog feels a little burdensome, but she has worked her way so deeply into our "family" that we really would be quite lost without her.

Sadie reminds me everyday of the simple pleasures of life.  She never complains about her meals, even if she gets the same thing everyday.  To her food is nourishment and nourishment is life.  Her excitement over a car ride, even when it may end up being a trip to the vet or groomers, reminds me that adventures are the spice of life.  You never know when it could lead to an off-leash exploration of new territory.  To her, a toy is a toy.  She doesn't care how expensive it is, as money means nothing to her.  A newfound stick in the yard usually provides better entertainment than the fancy squeaker toy that she destroys within minutes of receiving it.  Materialism is not the name of her game.  She also finds pride in her work.  When she is asked to perform a task and she completes it, you can tell that she finds tremendous satisfaction in that.

Most notably she finds joy in loyalty and being together.  Obviously, for dogs their survival depends on loyalty.  If she doesn't pull her weight, follow commands or take direction from those that care for her she won't survive.  She has to trust that we will make decisions that protect her, and when she does her needs are provided for.  I am no different.  I couldn't survive very effectively without the guidance and wisdom of my support network.  Finally, nothing makes for a happier dog than when both Nick and I are home, at the same time.  When this happens she prances around like she has won the lottery; a wonderful reminder of how special togetherness is.

Around this time of year, I sometimes get overwhelmed with the abundance of parties and gatherings that fill our calendar.  I am an introvert and usually get a little anxious about being over-scheduled.  However, with how busy our lives are it is a wonderful blessing to be able to have a time of year where we can focus on re-connecting with family and loved ones.  I grew up abroad and I didn't get this opportunity every year.  Nick has family all over the globe, and in the past I have too, and time together becomes extremely valuable.  I think Sadie is absolutely right being together strengthens bonds and reaffirms us of the community we are a part of, that is definitely deserving of a good prance.

Snow Days

It has been quite the process to get me to appreciate days like today.  I realize I am a Minnesota girl now, but I haven't always been.  I grew up in a country where we spent our Christmas on the beach, wearing sandals and walking on the reefs.  We always looked forward to it because the pineapples were sweet, the weather was warm and we had friends gathering that were so close we called them family.  We were a long ways from family at the time, so it was special to be able to share the holidays with the next best thing.

Thanksgiving in Madagascar usually meant a day off of school because mom liked to try and honor the holiday.   I remember one Thanksgiving in particular where we went out to eat at a local hotel and even got to go swimming in the outdoor pool.  We shared in our typical thanksgiving tradition of going around the table and telling everyone what we were thankful for.  Most important of all, the meal didn't include turkey, which was a food I didn't particularly enjoy as a youngster.

When we moved back to the United States in fifth grade, we returned home in March.  The snow was gray, the weather bleary and we were faced with the reality we wouldn't be returning "home."  It was a big adjustment and I think I took a lot of my distaste of the situation out on the weather.  I hated winter, because it was cold, but also because it was so far removed from what I was used to.  The onset of winter meant that I was no where close to the comforts of my childhood and where I grew up.  I used to complain bitterly about the snow.  Even in college my friends knew to avoid me during the first snowfall because it usually put me in a bad mood.  I would keep my curtains closed and huff and puff about how stupid it was that anyone would live here.

I used to blame my parents and my ancestors for choosing so foolishly to live in a climate that freezes for more months in the year than it thaws.  I would give myself permission to complain because at the time, I had no choice in the matter.  My family lived here, so I had to live here by default.  It wasn't my choice I would exclaim.

There was also the time I told my mom that we really should have a plan in this state that everyone evacuate during the cold weather.  If hurricanes and floods could force people out of their homes then why couldn't 40 below zero do the same?

I don't know that I would say that I particularly enjoy the full five to seven months of winter that we endure every year.  By January, which is the month I am usually most homesick for Madagascar, I am usually singing another tune.  However, today I woke up and marveled at the snow.  It looked so crisp and clean, I decided that if we have to live with the below freezing temps we might as well have something pretty to look at.  It makes me want to get out there and cross country ski, although this year I am going to have to try my hand at snow shoeing instead.  I now have fun memories associated with this weather and have obviously made a conscious adult decision to live here.

The arrival of winter leads to time spent with family at holiday gatherings.  This is treasured time, as we have family spread out far and wide.  The cooler weather means warm drinks, cozy fire places and snuggling under warm blankets.  Christmas lights provide a much needed glow to the shorter, darker days.  Snow on the ground calls for fun times skiing outside, wrapped in long underwear, mittens and scarves.  Now, the changing of the seasons doesn't so much remind me of what I am missing out on, it indicates what I get to look forward to.

Sleep

I really enjoy working night shifts, but I hate the lack of sleep part of it all.  I never pulled all nighters in college and I didn't enjoy lock-ins in high school because I don't sleep well during the day.  The thought of being in bed while the daylight hours are burning is beyond me.  So here I sit with a lot of hours of work behind me and several more ahead of me trying to understand why my body thinks its okay to only have three and a half hours of sleep.  Its beautiful outside, but judging the fact that last night I had to do jumping jacks in order to finish my charting, I don't think I should be too ambitious about getting much done.

Hence, today I am thankful for sleep.  I am not thankful for it because I've had a lot of rest the past few days.  I am thankful for it because I miss it, value it and can not wait to catch up on a little of it someday soon.  After all, once this baby arrives all hope for sleep will be lost anyways, right?

I have always been a notoriously bad sleeper in any situation aside from laying in my own bed at night.  My parents have many stories of trans-atlantic flights with a sleepless toddler.  In fact, the first trip we made to the United States was when I was two.  Our family here had never met me and anxiously awaited our arrival.  Despite my parents valiant efforts I didn't sleep for the duration of the trip.  However, upon reaching our destination and eager family, I promptly fell asleep and didn't wake until the next day.

I couldn't help but think of the many stories of sleepless nights that my parents still love to tell as I cared for a sleep deprived patient the other night.  There were many statements and pearls of advice that I heard flowing from my mouth that night that sounded strangely similar to the advice my parents would patiently give me as I lay thrashing in beds in hotel rooms during family vacations.

The ICU environment is awful at promoting sleep.  There is absolutely nothing restful about it.  Unfortunately, people are admitted to the ICU because they require close and frequent monitoring.  On our unit we work primarily with the brain.  While some measurements can be taken while patients rest,  much of our clinical information comes from a patient's orientation to their environment and how their body is moving and feeling.  This requires us to frequently wake patients up to do our assessments.  Therefore, optimizing their rest schedules as best as possible is often on the top of our priority list.

Every once in a while though we get those patients who, like me, are convinced they "just can't sleep and there's nothing that can be done about it."  It was this type of patient that I cared for Sunday night.  The kicker was that she was doing nothing to help herself.  I walked into the room at ten at night to find her on the phone, lights on, tv blaring and her sister snoring on the couch.  Knowing that this patient had not gotten adequate rest in several days, I began the process of slowly weaning her off her stimulation.

First, I had to calm her down over her frustrations with dietary.  Then I explained the importance of sleep in such a stressful situation.  Finally, I told her that the tv would not be allowed to be on throughout the night, unless she wanted to watch the station with peaceful nature scenes and classical music.  I turned out the lights and left the room.  I peeked in a few times, to find her resting.  When I returned an hour later for my assessment she awoke and stated that she had had the best night's sleep ever.  I informed her there were many hours left in the night.

She then proceeded to make several phone calls.  I waited, and when there was a break informed her that it was time to turn the phone off for the night.  She stated again, "I can't sleep.  I am not tired and there is nothing in this room for me to do."  Then it happened, my mom's voice shot through me as I said, "Well, you can't fall asleep if you're talking on the phone.  Now I am going to turn out the lights and you need to get some sleep."  At first, I was a little taken back and not quite prepared to sound like my mom just yet.  However, it worked and the patient was snoring before I even left the room.

As I sat down to chart, I stared down at my growing belly, and told my unborn child that there is more where that came from.  I feel quite convinced that there will be pay back for the ease of this pregnancy.  My mom has always insinuated that she hopes that I get a little pay back for the troubles I caused growing up; and given the stubborn, opinionated genes that have been contributed to our child's genetic make up, I feel confidant that parenthood should be a wild ride.  I guess in terms of sleepless nights and the "I can't believe I just said what my parents used to tell me" moments, I am ready.  Now I just need to multiply everything like ten times...or so I hear.  
 

Change of Pace

I am going to admit that I am not necessarily feeling rested and rejuvenated after my one day off.  I will also admit that I am a little exhausted at the thought of heading back to work for three more nights.  Daylights Savings and a Monday morning staff meeting made for two extra hours of work this weekend and that was more than enough for me.  Needless to say, I am a little fatigued.

However, I also have to admit that I had some really great moments at work this past weekend.  The kind of moments where I was reminded of why I am a nurse and how much of a difference nursing care can really make.  In that regard I am ready to head back again tonight.

As I was laying out on my living room floor soaking up some of the last bits of warm sun we'll get in the months ahead, my body aching from all the raking we've done in our yard the past two days, I was thankful for the change in routine yesterday.  During this stretch of my work schedule I work two stretches of three consecutive night shifts with only one day off in the middle.  Sometime, around yesterday afternoon, I start feeling a little sorry for myself because it never really feels like a day off.  I have to sleep for some of it and then I have house work to catch up on before I head into another stretch of nights, and by 10 pm I am so exhausted I have to go to bed again.

However, today I was able to reap the benefits of yesterday's change of pace.  I woke up this morning rested and ready to tackle a few more things before heading into work.  I even have three more blisters on my hands from raking to prove it.  I also woke up knowing that I only have three more night shifts and then I head into a nice weekend off.  There really is nothing quite like working the weekend away to make you appreciate a weekend off.  I guess even a small change in routine really can be helpful in adjusting my attitude and I am thankful for that.

Two Things

Today is going to be short and sweet as I am worn out from work and have to pull myself together for one more night shift!

First, my husband, brother and father-in-law welcomed me with a fabulous surprise when I woke up today- the windows are all in!  There is A LOT of finishing work to do, but the arduous process of removing the old windows and making the new ones fit is complete.  It already looks tons better on the outside of the house and they are such a dream to open and close.  Eeek, I've been so excited and it is such a relief to know that we made use of this beautiful weekend and we don't have to wait until the spring to start this project!  I am so incredibly thankful for how perfectly the timing worked out for this project.

Second, the Vikings finally won and my fantasy team looks like it is headed for a win!  I can't take any credit for either win, but it sure is nice to be associated with winning teams.  I guess it is one of those days where small things can really make my day...

Productivity

I am sitting here laughing at myself this afternoon as I am beginning to realize what this blog will lead me to admit.  About six weeks ago, I switched to a day/night rotation at work and last night marked the beginning of my stretch of nights.  I remarked to Nick about midway through the afternoon that it just doesn't seem fair that when you work nights you have to work while everyone is sleeping.  We had a busy day yesterday, and all I could think about was while everyone would be tucking themselves nicely into bed at the end of the day I would be heading to work.  However, I neglected to recognize that I do eventually need to sleep and that inevitably I would be heading to bed and tucking myself in just as the rest of the world was waking up.  I guess it does eventually work itself out, doesn't it?

This is a weekend where being close to family has come in very handy yet again.  Nick finally has a weekend off and he and his dad wanted to tackle the enormous project of installing new windows at our house.  However, with our house being small there really wasn't going to be a quiet place for me to sleep while they were working.  Here enters my wonderful family again.  I was graciously offered, or perhaps I requested, the use of the futon in my parents quiet and very dark basement.  It worked out well.  I woke up well rested this afternoon and found out that two windows were already installed at our house.

Even more phenomenal, I woke up to find my parents and brother feverishly working away at organizing their garage.  This too is an enormous project, as you can imagine, and they were conquering it with zeal.  And to think all this occurred while I was sleeping soundly in my bed, maybe this whole nights thing isn't so bad after all?!

Celebration of Life and Death

We had our 25 week prenatal appointment this morning and there is absolutely nothing sweeter to hear than the heart beat of our growing baby.  I seriously count down the days until each appointment just for those few seconds of sound bites.  With a heart rate of 140 beats per minute all checked out well.  I measured right on target for abdominal girth and the weight just keeps going up nice and steady.  All seems well and for that I am so extremely grateful!

Upon leaving the doctor's office, having experienced my own little celebration of the new life growing inside me, we rushed off to the funeral service of Nick's uncle.  Never have I been so vividly reminded of this journey of life that we find ourselves trekking in.  While listening to the speakers recount the life of their dear friend and stories of years gone by, I could feel the tiny movements of our little child inside me.

I couldn't help but marvel at the years of stories that are ahead of us.  I thought about the stories I have had thus far and the milestones I've achieved.  I thought about the memories that are yet to be experienced and how this little one is just embarking on that journey.  This whole life thing is a precious gift and quite the wild ride; today was a perfect illustration of that.

He's Back

My husband is back, my husband back!  No he was not on a trip and never actually physically left for any long period of time.  Today he finished up part two in a three or four part series (I am still trying to understand the process) of exams required for earning his medical degree.  Upon returning home tonight he had endured another eight hour, multiple choice marathon exam.  The last one was over a year ago, but none-the-less...yuck and no thank you I couldn't do it.

Don't get me wrong, he does an amazing job of prioritizing time at home and work.  I have always marveled at that.  It would be so much easier for him to completely immerse himself in school and work, but somehow he manages to find a balance between it all.  For that I am extremely grateful.  But obviously when major exams are close at hand, I lose just a little of his attentiveness.  

It is nights like tonight that remind me how intense this medical degree process is that he and his peers are navigating through.  I never really feel like things are as stressful for him as I am sure they are because he works hard to maintain a healthy perspective of work and home life.  However, when big exams like today are over and I get my entire husband back, then I am reminded of how stressful things can be.  Tonight I enjoyed having my whole husband at home.  The one that is 100% attentive to what is going on, who laughs freely and smiles quickly.  I really am madly in love with this man, and couldn't be more proud of all he does.

So, if I haven't said it enough; tonight I am thankful for the triumphant return of my wonderful husband!  :o)

Clean House

When we were first married, Nick and I lived in married student housing at the U.  The accommodations were really very nice and we were so thankful for the opportunity to live there.  However, I wanted a dog and so the house hunt began.

When we moved into this house, we were both so excited.  There was so much potential and it was so freeing to be able to morph this four sided structure into our very own home.  And a home it certainly has become.  Nick often comments on how awesome it is to come back at the end of the day and be able to relax and melt into our own sanctuary that we've created.  I couldn't agree more.

Our kitchen has come so far and I absolutely love to cook in it.  It is nearly complete now with the backsplash up.  We have a new window to install and then some lighting changes and all will be finished.  Here are a few pics of the most recent additions.

I especially love the evenings immediately following a solid house cleaning.  For some reason dinner tastes better and the evening seems quieter when everything has been picked up and put away.  Today, once the vacuuming, dusting and sweeping was over I sat down and really enjoyed my house.  The candles were lit and I just snuggled under a warm blanket on the couch and took it all in.  The only thing missing was a great glass of wine, unfortunately baby is still underage.  Regardless, I am one lucky gal and so thankful to be a homeowner.

A Voice

Today I was thankful for the opportunity to vote and the reminder that apathy accomplishes nothing.

A few years back I spent a month in South Africa with a group of students and two professors from Luther College.  It was a challenging trip.  I had never participated in a study abroad course before and the topic, Truth and Reconciliation in a Post-Apartheid South Africa, was very intense.  We had an ambitious itinerary, and experienced many parts of that beautiful country in ways that no tourist group would ever be allowed.

Sight seeing was not our priority.  We spent most of our time in conversation with South Africans.  We did not go on safari, and my pictures consist mainly of townships and Apartheid memorials.  Most of our days we listened as Black, White and Colored South Africans recounted their experiences during apartheid, throughout the Truth and Reconciliation Committee hearings and beyond.  My real memories are not in my photographs, they are in the journal I kept and mostly in the quotes of the many courageous and amazing people that we had the opportunity to meet.

The beauty and challenge of travel is that it provides us with an opportunity to remove ourselves from our comfort zone and gives us a chance to view our respective communities as an outsider.  This trip was no different.  There were many times when our conversations turned from South Africa to the United States.  We were often challenged by the South Africans we met to participate more fully in our democracy.  Americans are viewed widely as apathetic toward our government and the people we met were not shy in reminding us of how fortunate we are to have a democratic system that operates under relative peace.  This experience marked a turning point in my recognition of myself as a community member and not just as an individual.

It was with those memories that I voted today.  In recent months I have become increasingly frustrated with political campaigns and agendas.  I often feel that our system is not always looking out for the best interest of the community.  As a country it seems we are often impatient and short sighted when it comes to the real issues at hand.  We have divided ourselves on party lines and can't seem to work beyond them.  I have felt the apathy that I swore to leave behind in South Africa return, and I couldn't let that happen.  I didn't want to let down the people I met during the course of my travels.  I wanted to make sure my voice, as small as it may be, was heard today because too many people have fought hard and endured terrible things for their right to vote and for mine.

Thankfulness Project

I have always been a little baffled by our American tradition of Thanksgiving.  I never really understood the food or the celebration of white Europeans bringing over disease and displacing hundreds of indigenous people from their homelands.  A part of me has always doubted that the first thanksgiving was really as harmonious as our textbooks lead us to believe. 

However, as I've gotten older and my taste buds have matured, I now look forward to the opportunity we have to spend a day with loved ones recognizing the wonderful things we have in our lives.  The past few years I have found myself wishing that I could carry some of that spirit of Thanksgiving with me throughout the whole year.  How much different would my life be if I spent more time focusing on the good things in my life rather than the bad?  

Last year I was impressed to see a trend start up on Facebook where people dedicated the month of November to thankful status updates.  I loved reading as people chose one thing a day to be thankful for, it was a welcome change from the typical "...is it Friday yet?" updates.  It certainly spurred on my own thoughts of thankfulness last year, and when thanksgiving came around I was truly prepared for a celebration.  Therefore, I've decided this idea might make for an interesting blogging project this month.  I am going to dedicate this month of blogging to things I am thankful for.  I am going to try to make them specific to the day, but others may end up being a little more general.  I have a lofty goal of attempting to write everyday, but I'll take it one day at a time and see how it goes.

And so begins day number one.

Last night I was on the receiving end of an awesome hug.  It was one of those all encompassing, the world is good and things are all right hugs.  I had gone over to my parents house for dinner.  It had been a goofy day at work and my day had disappeared.  Nick was at home, immersed in his studying and the Vikings had lost. I didn't feel like cooking and my parents graciously invited me in.  We had an awesome night catching up, talking about life and politics and the baby.  It was exactly what I needed.

At the end of the night, my dad wrapped me up in his arms and gave me a total bear hug.  I left feeling like a million bucks because the whole night had felt like a monstrous hug.

I believe that I have the absolute best parents in the world.  I couldn't be more thankful for the wisdom they have imparted on me over the years and continue to provide.  I am constantly reminded of the sacrifices they have made over the years to ensure that my brothers and I have the best experiences possible out of life.  They are a tremendous support and incredibly encouraging of whatever endeavors I embark upon.  The older I get the more I realize that I have a lot to live up to as I head out on my own parenting adventures, but I am extremely thankful to have them available for guidance.  Not everyone is as blessed as I am and I recognize that.  Therefore, as I start out on my month long blogging adventure of thankfulness, I feel it is fitting to pay tribute to the two people that started it all for me...thank you Mom and Dad.  You are the best!